that's enough

yah itu perasaan yang menghantui gw untuk beberapa hari terakhir

rein

Vero nihil verius

March 25, 2009

“Tidak ada yang lebih benar daripada kebenaran itu sendiri”

Hidup ini terus mencari kebenaran
Tapi mengingat kebenaran yang ada selama ini
Kita hanya melihat
Segala kebenaran hanyalah sumber kegetiran hidup
Bukan menjadi motivasi untuk bertahan hidup

Kalau terus begitu
Buat apa manusia masih mencari-cari kebenaran
Buat apa manusia terus berjuang
Kalau segala kebenaran sudah ditetapkan oleh Tuhan

Kebenaran bahwa hidup tak selamanya indah
Kebenaran bahwa akhir hidup adalah kematian
Kebenaran bahwa kematian merupakan suatu kehilangan dan kehampaan
Kebenaran bahwa tak ada yang abadi di dunia ini
Kebenaran bahwa waktu terus berjalan
Kebenaran bahwa segala sesuatu perlu perjuanagn
Kebenaran bahwa yang benar akan selalu menang
Kebenaran bahwa terang akan mengalahkan kegelapan

Kegelapan

March 23, 2009

“kegelapan akan dikalahkan oleh terang”
“yang memilih kegelapan akan kalah oleh terang”

Sesuatu yang sudah menjadi klise
Menganggap bahwa kegelapan selalu jahat
Keliru!
Semua itu salah!
Apa memang kegelapan itu selalu jahat?

Bukankah kegelapan adalah suatu bentuk penantian
Penantian dalam menunggu datangnya terang
Kegelapan bukanlah penjara
Bukan juga jalan buntu
Melainkan pintu masuk menuju terang
Pintu untuk menyongsong sesuatu yang baru
Yang akan menjadi semakin berarti saat gelap kembali datang

Cup of Life

March 22, 2009

Manusia tak pernah bisa membayar segala sesuatu yang telah dilakukan
Manusia selalu berharap lebih tanpa berbuat banyak
Manusia selalu meminta lebih daripada memberi
Lambat laun keinginan manusia seperti cangkir yang terus diis sampai airnya tumpah

Dan disaat air yang jatuh semakin banyak dan tumpah
Saat itu pulalah manusia mengalami kejatuhan

Namun ada yang bangkt dan berdiri
Dan mencari cangkir yang lebih besar
Yang mampu menampung keinginannya lebih banyak lagi

Ada yang berdiam diri sejenak
Kemudian memecahkan cangkir yang sudah terlalu kecil

Ada yang jatuh dan tumpah tanpa pernah berusaha bangkit
Sampai air yang tersisa dan air yang jatuh pun habis dan mengering

Manakah diriku?
Manakah dirimu?
Akupun tak tahu

Malam tanpa bulan

March 16, 2009

Saat matahari tenggelam
Saat hitam menutupi bumi
Saat gelap menguasai hari

Malam ini menjadi malam
Malam tanpa bulan
Malam tanpa dia yang menemani

Sepi dan sunyi
Gelap dan dingin
Itulah yang menemaniku saat ini

I Don't Understand!!!!

I don't understand...
I don't understand...
I don't understand EVERYTHING!!!

Tormented Complex (TC)

Not Important at All, Don't Bother to Read

Feels like wanting to fill the blog, but I don’t have any interesting thing to be said.
Only some problems, but I don’t feel like writing it.
Well, maybe because people will grow bored if I write that again and again.
I’ll just fill in some random things.
I can’t think anything clearly, because my mind is clouded.
I am also distracted by something.
My structure and the arrangement of the sentences in this post will be absolutely awful too…
My head is spinning…
Hmmm…
Yeah, I have a week of holiday.
But, the teachers gave me lots of things and homework.
I haven’t finished any…
Haha11x.
Screw the homework…
I just need a time of peace…
Being in my room, just laying on the bed doing nothing will be absolutely a great thing!!!
Add some heavy metal music from the radio sounds good too…

Tormented Complex (TC)

Lonely Again

Another post from me.
So tired…
But also, I am relieved because I have arrived at my home.
Being in my school is so hard these days.
Having some problems again (well, always have, actually).
Maybe I can say I have problems with my social life again.
Well, that’s obvious.
Considering I am not really a person who can get along easily.
Sometimes, I think…
I contemplate.
What have I done in my life up till now?
I only keep studying.
Maybe that’s how I make myself to be visible to other.
Because that’s the only thing I can do!
I study; get some good scores in the exams to please my parents.
Try to do all the homework, then, lend it to my friend on tomorrow morning to be copied.
People only know me as a diligent student.
Someone, who they can rely on when they forget to do their homework.
Someone, who they can ask to finish all the group’s work.
Simply because I can’t abandon my duties.
That’s the only thing I can do.
Even if I have studied hard, I still can’t get really satisfying scores.
I can’t deny that sometimes I get pissed when I got bad scores.
Maybe because I have studied hard and that’s the only way for me to keep being visible in people’s eyes.
My mom ever said to me, “What’s the point for you to keep studying like that? You study for 8 hours and your score even lower than them who only study for 2 hours!”
She also said to me, “You work on your assignment for 4 hours, but your score even lower than them who just worked on theirs in the morning at school!”
What a pity.
My mom said that I have just to study, finish my education, pick a job, maybe as an accountant, make money, and then get married.
Surely boring life…
She also said to me many times that I don’t have talents.
So, what’s the point of that hard work?
Maybe no…
Just try to waste my time.
You know…
People stare at me with “fuck off” words written clearly on their faces.
I am pretty confident that they would rather spend 3 hours with someone they hate than being with me just for 5 minutes.
This Wednesday, my friend did a reflection for the religion lesson.
When I said that my talent is playing game, they instantly laughed on me.
Well, playing game is the only thing I think I can do.
No playing some silly mini games, but real games, which force you to think and master the controls of the game.
People even earn money by playing games!
The winners of Counter Strike competition earn 3 millions rupiah!
A professional gamer is really appreciated in America.
A guy with codename: F4atality is one professional gamers which well known in US.
Game producer will ask him to play the game they made.
If they get good reviews from him, the game will be absolutely become a hit.
A pleasant and relaxing job.
I wish people would see me not because I’m a diligent student who is useful for them.
I hope they can see me from what I really like the most.
I have thrown away my biggest dream.
Work alone again…
Try alone and keep the pain alone. (wow, good phrase!)

Tormented Complex (TC)